Alright, lovely, stop number twelve’s comin’ right up-Hill House School, standin’ before you like a beacon of youthful chaos and knitted jumpers. Take a look at that building, full of secrets, ambitions, and, famously, a right peculiar school uniform. You can’t miss ‘em-thick golden cable-knit jumpers, burgundy knickerbockers, a cravat to top it all… I mean, even a pigeon in Hyde Park would do a double take.
Now, pull up a chair-in your mind, that is-I’ve got a corker of a tale for ya. Hill House, or as it's poshly known, Hill House International Junior School, started life in 1949. But funnily enough, it weren’t even in Blighty to begin with. It was up a hill in Switzerland-La Colline, they called it. The founder was Lieutenant-Colonel Stuart Townend, known to the kids as “the Colonel.” And, between us, he picked his pupils based on which mums took his fancy. Not your usual headmaster, eh?
The Townends set up shop in London by ’51 and expanded all over Kensington and Chelsea quicker than you can say “school run.” And that Swiss connection? Still going strong. Older kids still get sent off to a Swiss chalet in Glion for school trips: geography, art, skiing-you name it. I tell you, when I was a nipper, our school trip was Maltesers out the vending machine, not Lake Geneva.
No stone’s unturned here. Hill House is now London's biggest junior school, teaching tots from sixty different countries. Most of ‘em chatter in two or three languages-makes my attempts at French down the chippy sound like a comedy act. Back in 2002, Hill House had more than eleven hundred pupils bustling through these halls-imagine the noise at lunchtime, eh?
Oh, the uniform. “Grey school uniforms make for grey minds,” said Beatrice Townend, the Colonel’s missus, who designed it herself-practical as a Swiss Army knife, loud as a market on a Saturday. Golden jumpers, burgundy knickers, a backpack dressed up in British racing green. I tell ya, no chance of losing that lot in the crowd-unless they blend in with a passing Routemaster bus.
And here’s a little royal fizz for your ears-Prince Charles himself, now King Charles III, put in his first term ‘ere after a nudge from then-Prime Minister Harold Macmillan. Little did they know he’d be the first heir to get proper schooled with the rest of us civvies, not just stuffy tutors and military types. It was a right royal shake-up, made the papers and all.
Don’t think it was all stuffy tradition, though. Hill House was always a bit of a lark-Peter York and Ann Barr stuck it in their Sloane Ranger Handbook, calling it “outdoorsy, musical,” and the place for “energetic extroverts.” Wouldn’t be surprised if you caught a sneaky recorder solo breakin’ out in the corridor. And if you love a telly appearance, the Colonel himself popped up on Wogan, spilling the beans for telly audiences-now that’s star quality, innit? Oh, and don’t forget the documentary: “Knickerbockers in Knightsbridge.”
If walls could talk, they’d be full of stories-not just about the Townends, but their famous lot. You’ve got Lily Allen, Anya Taylor-Joy, Mark-Francis from Made in Chelsea, half the Rees-Mogg family… you name it, they polished their apples right here.
So, next time you see a golden jumper and burgundy knickerbockers walking down the King’s Road, give ‘em a nod-you never know, you might be looking at the next king, prime minister, or, at the very least, a champion at the school recorder festival. Right, off we pop to our next stop!
